Some Things I’ve Learned in Life

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1. Don’t regret. Instead, think egret. It’s much healthier to think of birds with distinctive white plumage than regret some of the stupid things you may have done when you were younger. And egrets, by the way, don’t give you a lot of guilt.

Don't regret. Think egret instead.

Don’t regret. Think egret instead.

2. Don’t worry. This is a futile exercise like regret. So rather than imagine the worst regarding your spouse, child, or dog who isn’t home at the proper time, make a point to redirect your thoughts to elegant birds in the heron family. read more

Compromise Is Overrated

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It's 107 outside. Inside I'm watching Downton Abbey Christmas, entranced by the tree.

It’s 107 outside… and inside, I’m watching Downton Abbey Christmas, singing Christmas carols with them and entranced by their tree.

I’m in the desert and it’s 107 outside, a climate enjoyable only to cactus and lizards.

With that said, I’m thinking of Christmas trees.  I just finished watching Downton Abbey Season 5 and fell agog at the sight of the Christmas tree featured in the last episode. It’s the Christmas tree of Christmas trees, a dazzling, regal spectacle of fairytale lights and ornaments. It towers twenty or thirty feet tall at least.

Jerry and I have had differing opinions on Christmas trees over the years. He wants the kind of small fake tree you pull out of a box, stick on a table, and plug in. I prefer the whole ritual of riding our horse-driven sleigh out to the woods to chop one down. Although that could prove difficult here in the desert, it wasn’t out of the realm of possibility while residing in Washington state. I envision the joy of finding our special tree, bringing it home, turning on the Christmas carols, slurping mugs of hot chocolate~and together Jerry and I hum Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree and do a few high leg kicks in between our “ooohs” and “ahhhhs” at the tree’s beauty. read more

Time Stands Still Where the Pool Noodles Are

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Camelback Inn, Scottsdale, Arizona

The words below the clock read: “Where time stands still” at the Camelback Inn, Scottsdale, Arizona.

Where time stands still.

These words greet you as you enter the Camelback Inn in Scottsdale. The words, posted on the hotel’s exterior above the lobby, assure hotel guests they will enjoy themselves so much they will never look at their watch. At least that’s what I took away from it.

You probably remember the times where time stood still for you~your first kiss (thank you Pete Martin); your first car (beep, beep, the hey-everyone-I-have-a-new-car excitement); and all the everyday moments when time stops because you’re so engaged in the moment you forget about the clock. Like when you’re at Starbucks chatting with your girlfriends, in deep conversation about the Kardashians. Oh, okay, you don’t chat about the Kardashians at Starbucks and neither do I, but you know what I mean. read more

No regrets! Well, maybe a few

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I regret not telling you sooner that I have a personally autographed photo of the Cartwrights. Such an exciting aspect of my life that I've kept hidden until now.

I regret not telling you sooner that I have a personally autographed photo of the Cartwrights. Such an exciting aspect of my life that I’ve kept hidden until now.

A friend once said to me, “I make it a policy to never regret.” She said this after I asked how she liked her new living situation of sharing a home with her friend. When I told Jerry about her reply to me, he said, “Ohh! She regrets.”

Whether we admit it or not, we all have regrets. Of course, it’s best to move on and not dwell on what-could-have-been.

I regret very few things in my life. That said, here are the ones I do.

1. I regret taking showers in 7th grade P.E.  Why did I feel I had to submit to authority and strip naked? I really didn’t exercise that much, so I didn’t need a shower. No matter. I was forced to stand in line au naturel with other junior high girls, all of us dripping wet while holding a towel the size of a toilet paper square. The P.E. teachers checked us over to make sure we showered.  If we weren’t wet to their satisfaction, we were sent back to the showers. I regret I didn’t go to a parochial school where no one had to get naked for any of their teachers. read more

Eight Things I Learned about Life at Disneyland:

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Disney1

Life Lessons I Learned at Disneyland:

1. Mick Jagger must have been singing about Disneyland when his lips famously flapped, “You can’t always get what you waaaaahhhh-nt.” The price of admission to Walt’s theme park is more than the cost of a new Lexus or Audi. Even so, don’t expect to get everything you want.  Jerry and I signed up (and paid extra) for the “Walk in Walt’s Footsteps Tour.” The tour promised a behind-the-scenes look at Disneyland. Unfortunately, Jerry and I chose to take the tour the day before Disneyland kicked off its 60th Anniversary Celebration. Our Disney tour guide flat-out told us, “Ordinarily our tour goes to the Dream Suite, but we won’t go there today.” (sad face) And, “Yes, the Peter Pan ride is on the tour, but not today. It’s under construction.” (another sad face) The comment that should have been said but wasn’t, “Actually, this tour has hours to waste since we cancelled just about everything featured on the tour. Let’s start by killing time at The Enchanted Tiki Room, an attraction not on the tour and that you already paid for with your admission ticket and would probably not go to anyway.” The only thing Jerry and I got on the tour that we expected for our extra charge is a stroll through Walt’s apartment above the Firehouse on Main Street. We were not allowed to take any pictures inside Walt’s apartment, but the tour guide promised she would take our picture for us. “You’ll want this for your Christmas card,” she said (wink, wink).  Once our tour group stood inside Walt’s tiny apartment, our guide noticed a woman preparing to snap a picture of Walt’s Victorian armchair. She gasped in horror, “No! No! No! Only ‘I’ can take pictures in this apartment.” She took deep breaths to calm herself from the tragedy she had narrowly averted. Jerry whispered to me, “What’s so special in this apartment that we can’t take pictures? Are they afraid we’ll take a picture of Walt’s grilled cheese-maker?” We didn’t know the answer and still don’t. One thing I do know. The tour made me realize that sometimes in life you get disappointed and don’t get the Dream Suite, plus unfulfiled promises of Christmas card quality, (yes, we got blurry photos), and when you least expect it, you’re surrounded by fake tropical birds singing, “In the tiki, tiki, tiki, tiki, tiki room.” read more