Six Life Lessons I Have Learned
1. A watched toaster never pops.
You have to ignore the toaster. Don’t wait for the toast to pop up. Walk away. Get distracted by something else. Fold laundry. Do your taxes. When you get back to the toaster, you’ll find your toast has popped up. Except it’s cold. How long did it sit, popped up and waiting for you? Hmmm? I have learned the solution. Outsmart the toaster. Press the cancel button every few seconds. Pop up, push down, pop up, push down. Check the toast until it’s a light, golden brown. The toaster is ill-equipped to stop you from this ingenious action. And you will feel victorious as you enjoy your warm toast.